I messaged one of the students involved in my ministry recently, we’ll call him Josh.
Me: “Josh, how can I be praying for you this week?”
Josh: “Pray for peace, I could really use it.”
Me: “You got it man. How have you been?”
Josh: “I’m doing better, but things still aren’t going as planned anymore.”
I wish I could have told him that I was surprised. Josh got baptized two weeks prior to that exchange, so naturally, he’s been under some heavy attacks from the enemy. In fact, I could have predicted almost the exact situation he’s likely working through right now. The Sunday morning he got baptized, he told me what he was planning to do for the next few years of his life (making important plans for the future is a dangerous game when coupled with making a lifetime commitment to follow Jesus). That same evening, we had talked briefly and he told me that he had just had the best night of his life. He had spent the day on a lake with his friends; particularly with a girl he was interested in. I imagine things went well.
But, after chatting again the next weekend, I found out that things are no longer going spectacularly. He didn’t clue me in on much of the details, but I imagine things with this girl are no longer going as well as they once were.
I’ve come to this conclusion because when the devil attacks us, he attacks three things: our health, our stuff, and our relationships. I wish I could say I didn’t know what that’s like. But since I do, I know how to pray for Josh. I know how to encourage him. I know that he knows that if he ever needs to talk, I’m here to listen.
When the devil attacked me, he did it as I was transitioning into a new role as a ministry leader, beginning college classes for the first time, and preparing to guest speak at a small church in central Indiana. When he did that, he left me empty, spiritually dry, depressed, and angry with God—the perfect state of mind (*sarcasm*) to be in for all these exciting new ministry opportunities God has given me. The devil knew he only needed to do one thing to derail my momentum.
He did it.
It worked.
Now, as I heal, I’ve observed some of my students, like Josh, who are also experiencing loss, grief, and heartache. I will share with you the same thing I shared with them, the very lesson I learned when I was experiencing a loss of my own: Don’t mourn your losses alone. More broadly, don’t life this life alone
When Paul describes to the church in Corinth what Christ desires for the Church to look like, he compares the church to a body: many different parts, all with different roles, but one unit nonetheless (1 Cor. 12:12). Then Paul, as he’s describing how this body functions, tells us that each part of the body rejoices when one part is honored and each part of the body suffers when one part suffers (1 Cor. 12:26). If you’ve ever gotten a really good shoulder massage, you may have noticed how your whole body feels relaxed even though it’s only your shoulders being massaged. You feel good all over. That’s what Paul’s talking about with the church, too. Celebrate with those around you when they win, but, in the same way, mourn their losses with them too.
There’s a big bookshelf in the hallway of my childhood home. One time, when I was younger, I was running down that hall (I couldn’t tell you why… I was a pretty weird kid). I’m sure most of you can see where this is going. I stubbed my left pinkie toe on that bookshelf. I stubbed it so hard that I actually broke my toe. The pain was agonizing. I may have felt the bulk of the pain in my toe and foot, but the rest of my body still tingled with discomfort. My nervous system fired all sorts of signals all over my body. Similarly, the church should share in each other’s sufferings as the body shares the pain I experienced in my toe.
I’m eternally grateful for the people God has put in my life—Keagan being one of them—who not only celebrate my victories with me, but stick around to help me weather my storms, cry with me, and comfort me in my sorrows.
We need one another, and we need to be people who follow the Spirit and exemplify Jesus for one another. A Spirit-filled church is a church that clearly demonstrates traits of Jesus: comfort, encouragement, honesty, faithfulness, forgiveness. And that’s something I can be a part of.
God never meant for us to live this life alone. I’ve been harping on that statement with the students in my ministry since I started leading.
So don’t live this life alone.
Don’t celebrate alone. Let others rejoice with you.
Don’t suffer alone. Let others join you in your pain.
Don’t carry the weights and burdens of this life alone. Let others join you in your struggles.
You don’t have to walk alone. You shouldn’t walk alone. Not even Jesus did that.
This life is too short to spend all of it grieving. Let the people God’s placed around you remind you of the hope you have in Jesus. Let that bring joy.
Author Spotlight:
My name is Connor. I recently started an internship at my church leading our Young Adult Ministry while I take classes online through Grace College. I’m passionate about ministry, specifically in America. I want to be part of helping the American church change and grow. Read more of my writing here.
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